Feeling or labeling yourself a victim of your divorce is one of the most disastrous moves you can make. It will prevent you from moving forward into a new life. Victimhood renders you powerless. To create a new life after your divorce takes a person who is fully responsible for their past, present and future. Being responsible means having control over one’s life and that is what it takes to both recover from the emotional wounds of a divorce as well as plan for your new life.
If you consider yourself a victim then you believe
that you had little to do with what happened to you. You take no
responsibility. The responsibility is someone else’s and that leaves you with
no power. Victims blame someone else. Blame absolves them of their part in the
dissolution of their marriage. Blame keeps them stuck in the pain of the past
and their divorce.
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